If you are having a break-up fight in your head with a whole country, you know you are in trouble or at a turning point.
I'm stomping up the stairs, sweaty from walking around in the heat because my scooter hasn’t come when promised for the second time, I can't get food despite being cashed up and surrounded by a million cooks... "but not right now Miss. Sleeping!", and I'm getting ready for round 5 with the most temperamental washing machine in Southern India. Apartment residents use the rooftop 'laundry' which consists of a few strung out washing lines, about 15 pegs that 4 groups share creatively, and no shade and of course what Sanir from Bombay (my grumpy downstairs neighbour) and I now call The Stupid Bloody Piece of Shit Washing Machine that we battle with and curse over together which we thoroughly enjoy. Of course, now we are pretty good friends. He is hanging out for 12 weeks while his wife does yoga teachers' training and like me is in a domestic routine of hanging out, riding around the neighborhood, washing, watching telly, eating, talking to strangers, doing jobs. Being grumpy is perfect for doing washing, especially the thumping-the- crap-out-of-your-yoga-pants-on-concrete-slabs kind of washing because it feels so good to vent, and now I know why Indians’ clothes are so clean.
But for mental health my three options to get through my inner fight with all the shitty little things about India getting on my nerves are 1)pray 2) lie down, or 3) both. I take option 1. It goes something like this:
"Oh God. Please help me with my attitude. It really sucks, I wish I was a better person and all that but my specific point is ...because I know you are busy, that if I don’t get your help to change my perspective on all the shit that is not working out, like in the next hour, I am going to be the Screaming Hungry White Woman of Mysore Rooftops. And that is not how I would like to be remembered. God, my attitude is 'I should get what I want and should ask questions' but realise these don't really have answers because they are my questions, no-one elses' responsibility to answer and God, help me to shut up. Getting what I want is so close but so far away. Help me be content with confusion and patient while treading fucking muddy water. But mostly - and this is the big one - help me to trust people more. Please help me be like Keanu in the Matrix and discover a new reality (but can you make me look a bit smarter than him). Finally, thank you God for the guy who makes those buttery chocolate coconut balls because if I’m not premenstrual right now, then when I actually am, they are going to save me and everyone I deal with from a big, fat headache.
Amen.
P.S. thanks for making the extra pegs appear today in the crazy laundry space, because that’s one less thing I have to go buy in my "serviced apartment" that is neither serviced nor an apartment.
Ok, so I'm not going to change India. I can mutter and eyeball and tut all I like, but I've gotta trust the locals more. They are telling me how it is in their own special way. Indians are very honest, not deceptive, not mean-hearted. I’ve been here before – struggling against cultural differences and my expectations while travelling – it’s the toughest thing but it does sort out by about week 2 with varying degrees of ‘same shit, different situation’. I realise how how awful tourists must appear to communities where people don't have the opportunity to get outside their 'normal'. Feeling a little ashamed for the luxury of self indulgent moaning, I clean my own bathroom, and wait until someone in India is awake and ready to cook. Unbelievable.
Getting settled is a big part of being grounded enough to get the most out of my yoga practise, for me anyway. The feeling of being settled is a total skill that I've had to get better at in the last 4 years. It's not something you are given by someone else, you have to create it yourself. It’s taken me 5 days to finally get sorted, settled and identify what's missing that I need - a good cup of plain black tea. An apple. Fresh milk. Here's my top 6 must-haves to settle down and enjoy yoga life in Mysore:
1) Money
Getting cash out is straightforward - I can just use my domestic Commonwealth Bank debit card at a local ATM. There are no Cirrus signs on the local ATM, no indication you can use other international bank cards, so this was a nice surprise, no dramas. I bought no rupees over and changed a bunch of AUD with a money changer locally. The black market is active and cheaper than bank fees.
2) Food
2) Food
Mysore is Hindu so vegetarian is the norm. I’m not vegetarian, but found options at western style cafes. Going out to eat 3 times a day can be exhausting if you are walking in the heat, and sometimes it's nice to just be able to stay home. Fruit is fresh and plentiful in the First Main Street, Gokulum. Vegetables are plentiful but quality is ho-hum, depending where you shop. Sanir gave me the number of a young woman locally and she cooks for yogi bears in the neighbourhood for 100R ($2 AUD) a meal, lunch and/or dinner, and delivers. What’s not to like? I am very grateful to have found her.
3) Wheels
There is nothing more liberating than riding around on a scooter in a foreign town among the tide of local traffic. You love it or hate it, but I love it. It's the only way to really see a place fast, each trip you see about 50 new things, down streets, in houses, clothes, fare, places. Scooters are around 3000R or a bit less, you may have to pay a deposit. Go to Shiva (the Facilitator) in the pink house on 8th cross just up from the main shala. There are a lot of lazy, well-fed street dogs around his place - a measure of the man's character. Nice guy.
4) Sim card
To text and communicate with people here to get things you need, make arrangements to meet. Locals won't text you on international numbers, too expensive. If your phone is unlocked with your provider head to the First Main Road Gokulum with the cluster of shops and look for a guy in a red shop with Sim signs. He will replace your Sim with a local one for about 200R and then you buy 200R of phone credit and Internet access. Txts are 1 R which is 2 cent AUD. Cheap!
5) Expectations of accommodation
In tourism here there is no ‘standard’ or industry website that advertises accommodation options that you can openly compare like in regional tourism websites in Australia. Value for money is not consistent. What you get for $500/month AUD can range from 2 bedroom apartment with balcony and separate kitchen ($300 US), to a nice new, one bedroom apartment, with no real cooking gear and a fan, A/C extra $20 ($560AUD). Not that you need a lot of space, or AC in June/July. ‘Hotels’ are often used to refer to restaurants. 'Serviced apartments' means I have to negotiate with the cleaner what I want and how often, according to the manager here, who didn’t want to step in. Hmm. A bit awkward but negotiations are all about relationship building, and staying cool, smiling, head waggling, easy does it. People just want you to be happy and will keep asking if everything is OK? Very sweet actually.
6) Meeting a regular visitor to Mysore
I met Jennifer who's been coming here for 10 years to study with Sharath and Saraswati. She's a yoga teacher in San Fransisco, and has been invaluable at giving me tips about getting water, the places that do fresh milk, or coconut milk, the places to go for a beer, (thank god! A yogi who is not a complete saint) she showed me about how the traffic works and being assertive on scooters. She's a road cyclist and bonkers but I love her because she rides her bike around the major hairy 'ring road' and up very steep Chamundi Hill. It's just nice to have at least one person my age/culture who lives just across the park who I bump into in the neighbourhood and ask my questions.
3) Wheels
There is nothing more liberating than riding around on a scooter in a foreign town among the tide of local traffic. You love it or hate it, but I love it. It's the only way to really see a place fast, each trip you see about 50 new things, down streets, in houses, clothes, fare, places. Scooters are around 3000R or a bit less, you may have to pay a deposit. Go to Shiva (the Facilitator) in the pink house on 8th cross just up from the main shala. There are a lot of lazy, well-fed street dogs around his place - a measure of the man's character. Nice guy.
4) Sim card
To text and communicate with people here to get things you need, make arrangements to meet. Locals won't text you on international numbers, too expensive. If your phone is unlocked with your provider head to the First Main Road Gokulum with the cluster of shops and look for a guy in a red shop with Sim signs. He will replace your Sim with a local one for about 200R and then you buy 200R of phone credit and Internet access. Txts are 1 R which is 2 cent AUD. Cheap!
5) Expectations of accommodation
In tourism here there is no ‘standard’ or industry website that advertises accommodation options that you can openly compare like in regional tourism websites in Australia. Value for money is not consistent. What you get for $500/month AUD can range from 2 bedroom apartment with balcony and separate kitchen ($300 US), to a nice new, one bedroom apartment, with no real cooking gear and a fan, A/C extra $20 ($560AUD). Not that you need a lot of space, or AC in June/July. ‘Hotels’ are often used to refer to restaurants. 'Serviced apartments' means I have to negotiate with the cleaner what I want and how often, according to the manager here, who didn’t want to step in. Hmm. A bit awkward but negotiations are all about relationship building, and staying cool, smiling, head waggling, easy does it. People just want you to be happy and will keep asking if everything is OK? Very sweet actually.
6) Meeting a regular visitor to Mysore
I met Jennifer who's been coming here for 10 years to study with Sharath and Saraswati. She's a yoga teacher in San Fransisco, and has been invaluable at giving me tips about getting water, the places that do fresh milk, or coconut milk, the places to go for a beer, (thank god! A yogi who is not a complete saint) she showed me about how the traffic works and being assertive on scooters. She's a road cyclist and bonkers but I love her because she rides her bike around the major hairy 'ring road' and up very steep Chamundi Hill. It's just nice to have at least one person my age/culture who lives just across the park who I bump into in the neighbourhood and ask my questions.
